


Tales of the Z Fighters

by Flangst



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: Android Saga, Belligerent Sexual Tension, Capsule Corporation, Crush, Dishwashing, Domestic Fluff, Don’t copy to another site, F/M, First Kiss, Fluff, Gohan/Goku father son bonding, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Implied Sexual Content, Making Out, Shopping, Wedding, gohan is a good kid
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-01
Updated: 2019-07-02
Packaged: 2019-10-20 04:43:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 4,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17615714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flangst/pseuds/Flangst
Summary: A series of unrelated stories about DBZ. That's about it.





	1. Caves

After some searching, Gohan had found a cave he deemed adequate for their protection while they were on Namek. It was not inhabited by any hostile creatures or batshit crazy Saiyans, nor any of Frieza's very scary minions. Bulma had worked to set up camp while the boys scouted--or at least that’s what they said they were doing; they were probably loafing around on the next hill over. 

She cursed as she tripped over the same goddamn rock for the fourth time. There were times when she really hated being the only person with no powers. That’s what you got for cultivating your mind instead of doing push-ups all the time. And whatever other kind of stupid training Master Roshi put them through. 

After the fifth time tripping, she finally picked up the rock and threw it into the depths of the cave. There was a wet thud and something squealed in surprise. 

Bulma had never run so fast the other way in her entire life.


	2. Stalker

He did not care about the kid. 

He didn’t.

Sure, Gohan had been useful when they were battling the Saiyans and… yeah, ok the kid had wished him back with the Dragon Balls, but that didn’t mean they were all buddy-buddy or anything. Gohan was his student. His reluctant one at that. Ok, so maybe he had kidnapped him when he was four years old and stranded him in the wastelands for a year as per his particular brand of training. But the point was: he didn’t… care… about Gohan.

Which is what he told himself as he sat in a tree overlooking the house watching as Gohan chopped and hauled firewood for his mother. With Goku gone, Gohan was hard pressed to pick up the slack. Piccolo frowned. Goku was… well, he was the closest thing that Piccolo would consider a friend his own age, now that his goal of murdering the Saiyan was complete. But from what he’d seen, Goku was a rather poor husband and father. Of course he loved his wife and son, but that meant nothing if he was never around. 

Piccolo sighed. Who was he kidding. He did worry about Gohan. The kid was doing his best, but training all the time and doing chores when he wasn’t doing that… the kid had no time to be a kid. Piccolo wasn’t a human (or a Saiyan, thank heavens) but even he knew that human kids needed time to just goof off.

Finally he had enough of watching the kid haul logs. He flew down to his side. “Gohan… why don’t you take a break. I can finish this.”

“Mr. Piccolo!” He was unimpressed at how startled Gohan was; clearly he needed to be trained more on power detection. “I, uh. How long have you been?...”

“Three hours.”

“....”

“Go sit down. You need to break.”

“Ok, Mr. Piccolo.” 

He didn’t see Piccolo’s tiny smile as he hauled a pine trunk over his shoulder, branches and all, and dragged it to the house.


	3. Dick

“God, I cannot STAND you sometimes!! You are the most self-centered asshole I’ve ever had the misfortune of sheltering in my house!”

“How is any of that MY problem, woman?? It was your decision; if you couldn’t figure out what kind of person I was before then, that’s on you! Now leave me alone to train!”

“Nuh-uh! I’m not finished yet! Do you have any idea how much work it is keeping the gravity room operable with you breaking it every other day?? I have other shit to work on; I don’t have time to keep fixing it cause your stupid ass can’t figure out how NOT TO PUT ANOTHER HOLE IN THE WALL!”

“Maybe you should spend your free time thinking of ways for your pitiful gravity room to withstand my power then!”

“Maybe YOU should be more considerate of your host’s property!!”

“WELL, I NEVER WANTED TO BE HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE!!”

“NO ONE’S MAKING YOU STAY, PAL!”

“FINE!! THEN MAYBE I’LL GO TRAIN IN SPACE IF I’M NOT WELCOME HERE!”

“GOOD IDEA!! I ONLY LIKE POLITE ALIENS IN MY HOUSE ANYWAYS!”

“THEN WHY DON’T YOU INVITE STUPID KAKAROT TO COME TRAIN IN YOUR STUPID GRAVITY ROOM??”

“FINE! I WILL!”

“FINE! GOOD! I DON’T EVEN CARE!”

He did. A tiny bit. But he would die before letting that woman know that.


	4. New Home

“...And this is the bathroom. I assume you know how to use toilets and stuff, space boy.”

“DON’T CALL ME THAT! AND OF COURSE I KNOW HOW TO USE A BATHROOM YOU BACKWATER IDIOT!”

Bulma flipped her hair, annoyed. So far he’d been a model of ungratefulness, scoffing and sneering and shouting at her as she tried to show him his new living quarters. Now that he was a traitor to the Frieza empire and really had nowhere else to go, he’d reluctantly come to Earth with them. (God knew the Namekians weren’t about to welcome him onto their new planet) He’d responded to the offer with the attitude she was coming to expect of him.

“Don’t be such a whiner. Be glad I’m letting you stay here at all, pal.”

“BE GRATEFUL I’M NOT BLOWING THIS ENTIRE BUILDING OFF THE FACE OF THE PLANET, WOMAN!”

“Whatever. Anyways, this is your bedroom. Try not to destroy it, ok?” 

“Is this is a joke? Do you believe a Saiyan prince like me would deign to sleep in such soft quarters? DO I LOOK LIKE A WEAKLING TO--”

She shut the door in his face.

Later on when she came back to check to make sure he hadn’t broken anything, she found him sprawled out and snoring on the king-size mattress.

Some badass he was.


	5. Wardrobe Malfunction

He was so used to wearing the same clothing he’d had since his teens, he’d forgotten that there were other ways to outgrow clothing. 

Now that he considered it, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d worn his suit. 

Krillin stared in dismay down at the buttons that were flat-out refusing to close over his chest. No matter how he pulled and tugged and cursed, they wouldn’t quite align with the buttonholes. 

“C’mon, I’m gonna be late for the wedding,” he mumbled entreatingly as he tried again; as if somehow the buttons would listen and cooperate. Finally he managed to slip one into the hole and smiled triumphantly.

As soon as he let go it snapped off completely and went pinging across the room. Krillin swore angrily, clutching the lapel of his now ruined suit jacket. Well that was just great. The jacket was horribly deformed over his torso, straining to keep together over his shoulders and pinching his arms. Huh. Maybe he’d bulked up more through his training than he’d realized. It was hard to tell when one mostly wore loose-fitting monk robes. 

Honestly, the thought would have been rather ego-boosting if he wasn’t now completely suit-jacket-less and late for Goku’s wedding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This probably happened to someone in the group, right?


	6. First Kiss

“So, same time tomorrow?”

“Uh, yeah, sure! I think Goten is sleeping over at his friend’s house, so it’ll just be the two of us.” Videl tried not to grin at the thought. Gohan’s little brother wasn’t exactly awful to have around, but he was definitely a cockblock. Wasn’t his fault, but such was the way of younger siblings. 

“Ok, great!” 

A poignant pause fell between them as they awkwardly smiled at one another and fidgeted. 

Say something sexy! commanded Videl’s brain. But somehow, she didn’t think Gohan would appreciate hearing any of the… lines… she’d inadvertently learned from eavesdropping on her father’s dates. 

(Besides, telling Gohan he had ‘killer knockers’ would make no sense and probably scare him off. She had to be cool)

“Um… you’re a really great teacher, Gohan.”

He grinned at her and she swooned a little on the inside. “No, that’s all you! You’re a great student, Videl!”

How could anyone be so guileless and just so… genuine? Ugh. He was too nice, too perfect. It almost made her feel bad for having blackmailed him in the first place. 

“Erm… Videl, uh… now that we’re alone, I was… um… w-wondering…” Gohan’s cheeks went pink and he stared bashfully at the ground.

Her heart hammered at her ribs. Oh Kami. 

“Um...yeah?”

“C-can I… uh… t-that is-uh…um…” He laughed nervously, rubbing his neck and gazing at the sky as though it would magically hand him the right words to say. He was also much closer. Like, really close. Personal-space-bubble-invading close. Videl didn’t exactly mind.

“Spit it out, Saiyaman.”

Gohan choked on his words, all visible skin from his collar up bright red. When he didn’t say anything and just stood there stammering, she sighed and grabbed her pellet for her chopper. 

“See you tomorrow, th--” As she turned away, she was grabbed by the shoulder, and Gohan’s untrained lips pressed hopefully against hers. 

Videl made a noise against his mouth that he must have interpreted as bad because he pulled away and she could tell he was about to apologize. Well, she wasn’t having that. Wild horses couldn’t drag her away now! Because she’d punch them in their stupid horse teeth. She grabbed Gohan’s jaw and resumed the kiss. 

Eventually they sort of stopped and just stood there, hands clamped awkwardly on each other’s shoulders, staring into each other’s eyes and trying to comprehend what had just happened. Was it a moment of spontaneous teenage horniness? The resolution of months of unresolved sexual tension hovering just under the surface? An unspoken declaration of affection? 

All of the above? 

“Hng,” was what she had to say about the whole thing, as her brain had checked out some several minutes ago. Gohan nodded silently, just staring at her.


	7. Crush

_“You killed Dr. Gero right? He’s the one who hated Goku, so now that he’s dead why do you even care?”_

_The black-haired android smirked down at him, shaking his head like he was amused that the little man couldn’t understand. “Gero has nothing to do with this. You see, Krillin, we’re playing a game.” Krillin shivered; this guy was a real sociopath, and Krillin had seen quite a few in his lifetime._

_“A game?? THAT’S why you’re doing this? That’s your only reason?” Krillin’s already frayed temper was close to snapping._

_“In a word, yes. Of course, we could just force the information out of you... but hunting him down is much more fun.” It was a heartless thing to say. The blonde woman had remained silent, examining Krillin curiously. He tried to ignore her._

_“I don’t suppose there’s anything I can say that’ll make you change your minds, is there?” He was resigned; there was no way he could take on a trio of androids that had just wiped the floor with two Saiyans, a Namekian, and one of the most powerful humans on Earth._

_“Negatory.” This time the gigantic red haired fellow spoke up. His voice was oddly robotic--maybe he wasn’t as advanced as the other two. “Killing Goku is my one purpose.”_

_“And the machine has spoken!” The black-haired android chuckled. He glanced down at Krillin. “You’d better go see to your friends; they don’t look too great.”_ _As though he hadn’t just helped take them down._

_Krillin stared, speechless, as the two males walked off. The blonde woman approached him, however. He froze, afraid she’d decided to get one last punch in and put him through the cliff face._

_Oh._

_Oh,_ that _wasn’t a punch._

Krillin hadn’t been able to forget about the kiss for weeks. Even though he hadn’t seen the androids since that day on the highway, he saw 18’s face everywhere he went. It was driving him to distraction. Krillin wasn’t stupid. He knew perfectly well what it felt like to have a crush on someone. And that was it all it was.

“Krillin?”

Just a perfectly harmless crush.

“Krillin?”

Barely an infatuation, if he was honest.

“Hey. Krillin.”

It wasn’t like he’d completely committed every detail about how perfectly soft her lips felt against his cheek or anyth--

“KRILLIN!”

He jumped in his chair and looked up. Bulma was standing before him, an irritated expression on her face, holding a pot of coffee in one hand. “Uh, hey, Bulma, sorry, I dozed off--er, what were you asking?”

“I wanted to know if you wanted more coffee,” she replied lightly, already snatching his mug and pouring more in before he said anything, “and seeing as how you didn’t hear me for the past 5 minutes I’d say you needed it.” She set the mug down in front of him and headed back to her workbench. Krillin felt himself blushing as he grabbed the mug, accidentally sloshing a little of it onto his shirt. Great.


	8. Marriage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to say Goku is a little OOC in this one. It's hard to imagine him actually caring this much about Chichi's opinions.
> 
> There's implied sex but I don't think it's enough for a Mature rating.

“Chichi, why don’t you put Gohan to bed? I can take care of the dishes tonight!” 

Chichi stared at her husband in surprise; it wasn’t like Goku to offer to help with chores. Not that he never helped around the house--it was just that the extent of “help” he offered in the kitchen was typically “help finish these leftovers.” 

“Yeah… yeah, all right! Just don’t break anything. Come on little man, it’s time for bed.”

“Mooooom, I’m not s-sleepy…” mumbled Gohan sleepily, his eyes struggling to stay open. Chichi smiled and picked up their son, who yawned mightily and nestled his little head against her shoulder. He didn’t fuss as she got him into his pajamas and supervised the nightly facial and dental hygiene routines. A day of fishing and training with his dad had really wiped the little guy out. Good. In spite of how all the training made Chichi grit her teeth occasionally, it also meant that Gohan would sleep soundly through the night. 

“Goodnight, sweetie. Sweet dreams.” She pecked his forehead and he opened one eye.

“Night, Mom…” And within minutes he was out cold. Chichi sighed. He had already seen far more than any little boy should. Raising a half-alien child presented Chichi with challenges she never could have foreseen--her seven-year-old son had powers beyond compare, powers that caught the interest of aliens both evil and benign (Well, mostly benign--she still didn’t trust Piccolo as far as she could throw him). She did know, deep down, that the training he engaged in was a way to protect him, as much as she hated it. 

She just didn’t want that to be all he knew.

When she returned to the kitchen, she was pleasantly surprised to find it was not a soapy disaster, and that all the dishes had in fact been scrubbed and returned to their proper locations. Except for one mug, the shards of which Goku sheepishly tried to hide behind his back when he saw her.

“It was an accident, Chichi, I swear! Heh, sometimes I don’t know my own strength… plus it already had a crack in it so really it was just a matter of time--”

She shushed him with a quick kiss. “It’s fine, you big goofball. Honestly, I’m just pleased the kitchen isn’t a wreck. Thanks for doing this.” He grinned hugely and puffed his chest out a bit. 

“You’re welcome!”

“Gohan went right to sleep. I think you really wore him out today.”

“Oh, yeah, we did some tough training! He’s really getting strong, Chichi, you should’ve seen--” He caught the look on her face and his excited expression fell. “What’s wrong?”

“Hmm? Nothing! I’m glad you two are spending time together,” she lied, forcing a smile. 

He knew her too well. Concern knitting his brow, he walked over and pulled her into a hug. “Chichi, I know how you feel about all the training, but… you know I wouldn’t be pushing him so hard if I didn’t think it might save his life. I mean, well, he’s very strong Chichi. Like, really really strong… You know that, right?”

She sighed against his chest, arms coming up around his waist. “I know. I just worry. Goku, what if it all amounts to nothing? What if someone comes and takes him away for good, or...or…” She didn’t even want to voice the other possibility. 

“Chichi?” She looked up at him and was struck by the intensity of his dark eyes. “I swear to you, I’ll do whatever I can to protect him. I’ll die again before I let him go.”

She felt herself tear up unexpectedly and buried her face against his chest. He held her tight, rubbing her back gently and making soothing noises. “I don’t want to lose you again, Goku.”

“I know. I don’t want to lose you either.” He paused and took a breath. “I’m sorry, Chichi.”

“For what?” She peered up at him, unaccustomed to hearing apologies that weren’t really just attempts to placate her.

“For… everything. For dying. For leaving you so much. For being… me, I guess. I know life would be a hundred times easier for you if you’d married anyone else--” 

A firm finger over his lips silenced the stream of self-depreciation. Chichi squirmed out of his grasp, glaring at him.

“You listen here, Son Goku.” He gulped. She was using her Voice. “I didn’t marry you for an easy life. I married you because I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Yes, it’s true, you being an alien makes things complicated, but if you think I’m going to walk out on this marriage because half the universe is out to get you, then think again, buster! You’re stuck with me for life!” She planted her hands on her hips, daring him to challenge her. 

Goku blinked several times, mouth agape. Whatever he was thinking, he was obviously pleased with her answer because he scooped her up and kissed her passionately. For a few minutes the only noises in the kitchen were the sounds of smooching and moaning and hands roaming over clothing. Finally they parted and Chichi was so stunned she had nothing to say.

Goku grinned at her flushed face. “Hey, maybe I could still make up for being away for so long…” he murmured, nibbling her earlobe and kissing her neck. 

She finally shook herself out of her daze, and tried to keep her voice steady as he worked his way to her shoulder, nudging her dress aside. “But, Goku--mm!--what about Goh-aa… what about Gohan?”

“Chichi, he’s my kid. He sleeps through everything. But, if you’re worried…” Without setting her down he pushed the door open with his foot and flew up to the roof. 

And just like his father predicted, Gohan blissfully slept through everything. In fact, the only person who had any inkling anything was going on was one horrified Namekian whose mental probe accidentally came into contact with a horny Saiyan and his wife. Needless to say, he kept his thoughts plenty far away from Mt. Paozu for the rest of the night.


	9. Birthday Present

“Oh, Dad, look, kittens!”

Gohan dangled his hand into the pen as the tiny fuzzballs mewed and batted his fingers. He giggled, petting their soft fur. Chichi didn’t want any pets in the house (Icarus didn’t count as a pet but he certainly wasn’t allowed inside) so he didn’t get a lot of chances to pet soft, fluffy critters.

“They’re pretty cute, Gohan, but I’m pretty sure Chichi doesn’t want any pets.”

“Yeah, I know. I just wanted to play with them.” They’d been wandering through the mall for a couple hours now, trying to find the ideal gift for Chichi. Her birthday was tomorrow. It wasn’t that Goku had forgotten, exactly, but he also never knew what to get for people and so he put things off until the last minute. As for Gohan, he had been asking around for gift ideas and had gotten nothing useful from his friends.

_“Panties!” Roshi had suggested with a lecherous grin as Oolong nodded in the background. Gohan had no idea why he’d even asked._

_“Maybe, some… flowers?” Uh, that was a little lame, Yamcha._

_“Geez, Gohan, you’re asking the wrong guy. Your mom doesn’t like me that much--” Thanks Krillin. You’re no help at all, bye._

_“She needs to go on a cruise!” Gohan had to remind Bulma that not everyone was as wealthy as she was. “Oh yeah. Maybe that’s what I’ll give her.”_

_He didn’t bother asking Vegeta, and poor Trunks didn’t know his mom at all, so he was a loss too._

_Bless Mr. Piccolo, he’d tried. “Maybe… uh… an… apple?” An apple? “I saw her eat one once! I don’t know what your mom likes, Gohan, and I don’t care about birthdays!” He’d flown off in a huff._

Finally he’d given up and planned a day trip to the mall with his father. And they still hadn’t found anything. New clothes? No, Goku had actually remembered to get her a new dress over Christmas. New kitchenware? Nope, there was nothing wrong with the stuff she had. New books? Actually, that was the one gift she liked to buy for herself. Goku had zero clue when it came to books and Gohan was expressly forbidden from “even looking at any of Mommy’s ‘special books’ for grownups,” even to buy them as a birthday present. Moms were weird.

“Maybe… do you think she’d want some jewelry?” the boy wondered, gently running a strand of pearls over his fingers. His mom didn’t wear much jewelry outside of her wedding ring and the odd pair of earrings, but hey, maybe she was looking to update.

“Gosh, yeah, that’s a good idea, Gohan!” His dad leaned down to inspect a case of bracelets before wandering over to talk to the jeweler. Gohan entertained himself tapping dangling necklaces to make them catch the light. Next thing he knew his dad had grabbed his hand and power-walked out of the jewelry store with him in tow.

“What’s wrong??”

“Well… the next Budokai Tournament won’t be til 8 months from now and the only way we’d be able to afford anything from there is to win the prize money from one of those.”

“Oh, wow. So no jewelry, then.”

“No, Gohan. I, ah, don’t think that’s going to be happening.”

They took a break at the fountain and Goku bought them ice cream. Gohan licked despondently at his vanilla cone. Chichi’s birthday was in two days and she had the worst husband and son in the world who couldn’t even find her one lousy present. He gazed around the mall without really seeing, mind racing as he wondered what he could possibly come up with on such short notice. His gaze stopped on a woman with a sketchpad sitting on a nearby bench. She had various sketches of people, animals and landscapes set up around herself, along with a price chart. Gohan’s eyes widened. That was it!

He walked over to the woman, who brightened at the sight of a customer approaching. “Hi there!”

“Hi! Uh… How much would you charge for, um, a family portrait?”

_Two days later…_

“Happy birthday, Chichi!”

“Yeah, happy birthday Mom!!”

“Aw, you two are the sweetest!” Chichi kissed her son and husband as they led her to her seat to give her her presents. “And you even made cake!” The cake was, admittedly, mostly burnt, because Goku couldn’t cook anything that wasn’t a slab of raw meat and Gohan had been busy elsewhere, but at least the kitchen was officially burn-mark-free.

“Mom, this is for you from both of us!” Gohan handed her a thin, meticulously wrapped (not by Goku) gift.

Chichi tore the wrapping paper open and put her hand to her mouth when she saw the picture, her eyes wide and shiny. “Oh… oh Gohan…”

“D’you like it, Mom?” he asked anxiously, twisting his fingers together. “I hope it’s--OOOF!”

She grabbed him in a one-armed bearhug, squeezing the air from his lungs. She’d snagged Goku with her other arm.

“Nngh--Chichi--Chi--you’re kinda squashin’ us--” rasped Goku. She loosened her grip slightly but didn’t release them. Gohan realized she was sniffling slightly.

“Oh, Mom, no, you can’t cry on your birthday!”

“It’s my birthday, I’ll cry if I want,” she chuckled, planting a wet kiss on her son’s cheek. “Oh boys, this is so beautiful, I love it! Thank you so much! I’m going to hang it right in the kitchen where I can see it all the time!”

Goku and Gohan grinned at each other over her shoulder. The sketch of the three of them was hung on the wall right next to the stove the next day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still hard to picture Goku this way but... ah well.


	10. Monster Hunter

“It’s just around the corner, Goten, I can sense it! Hey! Watch out with that video camera!”

“Sorry Trunks! Hey, maybe I can catch the monster and you can hold the camera now?”

Trunks sighed heavily, pushing his pith helmet up from where it was sagging over his eyes. Goten just didn’t understand. They couldn’t all be the heroic monster hunter. 

“I told you, I’m the hero guy and you’re the cameraman sidekick guy! And then next time you can be the hero guy or something.”

Goten sighed. “Fiiiine.” He returned to his somewhat wobbly recording. Darn Trunks was always the super cool hero guy and he was always the sidekick. He amused himself by zooming in super close on random parts of Trunks’ body while his friend was talking.

“It’s time to show the world the horror of… The Scary Bathroom Monster!” 

Trunks dramatically flung the door open. 

“TRUNKS! CLOSE THAT NOW!!” Goten almost dropped the camera in fright. 

“Run for it!!” Trunks grabbed his friend’s hand and the two boys bolted before the wrath of Bulma, in a bathrobe, before her morning coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Baby Trunks is That Friend.


End file.
